10 things that scare the crap out of me.
I am a self-confessed wimp. I’m a huge scaredy-cat & I found it hard to narrow my list down to just 10!
1. Death (of someone else)
- Death itself doesn’t scare me. Death of someone I love scares every fibre of my body. I lost my best friend four years ago, it was very sudden & it deeply affected me. I still feel as upset when I think about it as I did then. I am truly terrified of losing anyone else I love, as I’m sure most of us are.
2. Falling pregnant again
- This one is easily avoided but I still have this horrible niggle in the back of my mind. Before I had Dexter I felt as though I could have given birth at least another hundred times & would have gladly had 16 children if finances allowed (they didn’t). Then I had Dexter, the birth was horrific & I have never been as scared as I was lying there in that hospital theatre – I was sure I was going to die! If I got pregnant again then the whole experience would be terrifying & I’d be forever worrying whether I would have a massive bleed again.
- Seriously. I HATE being sick. I have managed to stop myself shouting for ‘Huey’ for an incredible amount of time – I have had a few stomach bugs & morning sickness in the last three pregnancies but, amazingly, kept the sick at bay. People never believe me when I tell them this but it really is true. It takes a lot of mind control & constant ‘I will not be sick’ chanting on my part but I have learnt how to stop the upchucking.
- URGH! This is a massive phobia I suffer from. Horrible little dusty creatures sent from Lucifer himself. I hate the way they flutter around and miss everyone and come directly for me – I’m a moth attractor! N.B. This also applies to butterflies & birds but they’re less scarce & more pretty so I’ll leave them off.
Cover of The Omen (Photo credit: Amazon)
5. Kids in horror films
- I enjoy horror films. I enjoy them because I respond to them & because the do actually scare me. I can cope with all kinds of horror & can even stomach the gore. What I can’t with is children in horrors. Oh man, they totally freak me out. I think it may be that children are so innocent & to see them any other way is just creepy; really, really creepy! Think Damon from The Omen, The Children of the Corn etc.
6. Being alone
- I’m not one for my own company. I like to know someone is around all the time, I get proper freaked out when I’m alone. This may be why I have a large family, I don’t know. I just hate the thought of being alone, I hate an empty house & I need someone to be within shouting distance at all times.
7. Not being liked
- I was debating whether to add this as it sounds totally desperate. This probably stems from my youth when I needed approval all the time & now things are no different. I actively avoid getting close to people so that I don’t have to worry if they like me or not! It’s an odd one, I admit, I just like to be liked.
8. Getting old
- When I was 29 I was crapping myself about turning 30. I mean, I feel 16 still how on earth could I be 30? That’s like a real grown up. Yes, I know I have children & a house & grown up stuff to deal with but I still didn’t feel thirty. I’m over that now… I’m not over that I’m going to be 40 next. No way. Never. 40 is how I see my Mum (she’s nearly 60 actually, but I see her as 40).
Gail Platt (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
- Now this little dude seriously scares me. ‘Elliottt’. I think it’s from watching the film when I was quite young & being seriously disturbed by that scene where E.T’s body went white in the water (or whatever it was). Ever since then I have avoided the ugly little alien. Well, until someone posted a picture of him with a wig on saying it looked like Gail Platt…
10. Of never being happy
- Not happy per-se, more not depressed. Depression is an awfully big pit to climb out of and the tiniest knock can send you tumbling right back down again. I’m scared of never reaching the top of that pit & climbing out forever. I only ever manage halfway before something throws me again and that’s just pitiful.
So there’s 10 things I’m scared of. Some trivial (to you) and some pretty deep. I probably have another thirty I could add but I won’t – these are my worst. My 10 ultimate fears.
I’m sure we’re all scared of some wonderful & weird things. What scares you?